American Idol. v1

Okay. Is it me or does anyone else not care about these new judges. Oh. I am speaking of the American Idol judges of course. Randy is back. Steven Tyler and Jennifer Lopez are introduced next. If you are like me, I am thinking, BRING ON THE AUDITIONS. It’s the 10th season so this much be good. It is a requirement, not a recommendation. Steven Tyler sold 150 albums. Jennifer Lopez sound 55 millions records. Does anyone know the difference between an album and a record. I will check dictionary.com later.I don’t know one song Steven Tyler sings but I believe there will be a lot of cursing and laughter this season. Oh,Jimmy Iovine is on the scene also. Did Clive Davis give up this season?


Okay, it’s time for the auditions.

Rachel Zevita singing Hallelujah. She didn’t do well. She did better in Season 6. They are wrong for wasting a spot with her. Not a winner but she does have a pretty face.

Caleb Hawley. I want to sing him home just on looks but he can actually sing.

Kenzie Palmer. She can sing but I don’t like her.

Achille Lovle. I know she is from the Ivory Coast but couldn’t she learn a song in English. Why are they even thinking about this. Just move on.

Tiffany Rios. The girl with the stars on her ta-tas. Oh my. Did she just start the ugly cry when she saw Jennifer? And she is singing a song she ‘made up’? LOL Next. Oh, that note. Is not of God. She has another song. She can actually sing.

The dude with the perm. Looks like an Iraqi who had an affair with a Black soldier. Yeah. No.

Robbie Rosen (was in a wheelchair when he was in kindergarden). I love the song (Yesterday) and he can sing. I can see him in the top 20.

Okay. So they are going to commercial and this girl falls down the stairs. Then she becomes a puppy and crawls across the sidewalk. I am trying to fastforward to see what happened. But in the midst of fastforward I see the Asian Michael Jackson. I stop. Its not Michael Jackson. Its Miley Cyrus. Really? How do you mixt the two? This is the funniest thing on the entire show all night. Seriously. You cannot make this stuff up. This dude is fa serious doing Michael Jackson to Miley Cyrus.

Okay, I am back to fastforwarding. I really want to see this chick fall again. I know. Crazy.

Wait. I stop on Brielle Von Hugel. She catches my attention. She is singing my song and she seems okay but I cant see myself downloading her music on iTunes. I like when Steven Tyler likes someone. He is almost speechless.

Travis Orlando. His story is heartbreaking. He lived in a shelter and his dad was sick. When he said he would see the moving trucks come back and hope they were for him. Tear. I don’t care if he can sing. Can someone give him some money or something? Oh, he can sing! He gets to sing two songs. And both are great. Dang, he probably wont win but I want him to. Can I vote now? Oh. His mother just pushed me over the top. He needs this so much. Oh, I want him to win. Okay America. We gotta start a campaign or something. They said 51 are off to Hollywood but I just need Travis to get a break. I am with Ryan. TEARS!!!

But wait. What happened to the chick who fell down the stairs? Did I fastforward past her? Dang. I am not going back. So. From my house to yours. Rita. Out.